Comfort

When, during morning meditation, childhood feelings percolate, my adult self and Inner Child aspect confer. Together, we look at and feel the emotional states that bubble up from memory. The adult me simply remains present, extending the embrace of kinship to the child experiencing fear, pain, grief, or joy, — whatever transpires. This process, — referred to as `re-parenting´, — allows the lifetime reservoir of pent-up, unattended feelings to drain at its own pace, a pace which allows their attendance in a healthy, healing manner…

Healing Community

Abandoning out true selves is akin to building our house in our neighbour’s garden. We build those homes, and we decorate them with the love, care, and respect that make us feel safe at the end of the day. We invest in other people, places, and things, evaluating our self-worth based on how much those homes welcome us. But what many don’t realize is that when we build our homes on a foundation comprising other people, places, and things, we give them the power to make us homeless…

Disorganized Attachment

When we had finally eaten in the breakfast room, with Daddy presiding, it was off to school with a high probability of arriving late, for which, of course, I was regularly scolded, and sometimes punished. It was only after this milestone that I could begin to relax into the new day. It is difficult to convey the quality of domestic chaos which kept me in a constant state of tension, anxiety, and hyper vigilance…

Rewilding the Spirit

Instead, with recovery over time, we come to the realization that nobody, no relationship, no success, no shining toy, is coming to rescue us and heal what’s broken on the inside. In this new-found clarity it dawns on us that we already have our very own garden which contains everything we have been seeking and all we need. That garden has always been waiting for us. An inside job beckons…

Carcinogens

Further, more detailed data on these rising figures published last year in the Journal of the American Medical Association showed that from 2010 to 2019 in the United States, breast cancer accounted for the highest number of cases in the under-fifty population, while rates of gastrointestinal cancers were rising the fastest. This dramatic increase in gastrointestinal cancers alone demonstrates the implications and risks associated with our modern culture…

Food?

Evolution is a slow process. Our bodies have evolved over thousands of generations to extract and digest proteins, calories, and vitamins from organic food in a certain way; ultra-processing interferes with that. It’s not necessarily that we’re eating too many calories (which we are) and engaging in insufficient regular exercise (also true), it’s that those calories, now synthesised, are coming in a way that our bodies cannot effectively assimilate. This is the advent of the Super-Size-Me Effect…

Misfortune

In the cultivation of emotional sobriety, we first become the witness to our own patterns of thinking and feeling. This is achieved by taking inventory of self. We then learn that we can have our feelings without our feelings having, (i.e., controlling) us. We come to realise that there is a gap between impulse and riposte, and that we can begin to work with, and gradually take up conscious residence in, that gap…

Waking Up

I cannot remember a period prior to incessant rumination about who I was going to be when I grew up. In retrospect, under ideal circumstances this question would never have arisen. I would have been secure in simply being me. That would have been the sturdy foundation for further healthy growth and development. In the absence of such a foundation, we develop neurotic tendencies and come to believe in the reality of our idealized self. The false self lures us into the belief that it is the only true self. We have been hypnotized, have fallen asleep…

Signposts

We have created a culture which promises success and happiness, if only we identified and acquired the right ingredients out there. The right education, the successful career, the perfect partner, the recognition of our peers, even the right car. The title of this game is: `I’ll be happy when…..´ This is the lie of the Inner Critic, or Judge Saboteur, which is constantly engaged in judging self, others, and circumstances…

Big Mind

Recovery is about moving from illusion to truth. We acquire the insights and tools required to escape the bondage of constant anxiety and fear. Now it is clear that, while I have my feelings, I am not my feelings. That is a great leap forward indeed. It is not the full story, however, as beautifully elaborated by Stephen and Ondrea Levine in their inspiring book on cultivating Spirit in relationships, `Embracing The Beloved´…

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