Such is the imperfect nature of man! Such spots are there on the disc of the clearest planet; and eyes like Miss Scatcherd’s can only see those minute defects and are blind to the full brightness of the orb.
Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.
Anonymous, attributed to Winston Churchill
If you’re not scared of new technology (AI), you’re not paying attention. If you’re not excited by the new technology, you have no imagination.
Mark Little, Tech Entrepreneur
We are all acquainted with at lease one hopeless pessimist. Perhaps, at times, that person is us! No matter what input we bring to bear on the difficulties they share with us (and they usually do), the response is inevitably a `yes, but´ (which always means `no´) followed by incontrovertible arguments as to why nothing will, or ever can, help. When we are mentally fit, we practice empathy as we listen. Otherwise, we usually lose out temper, or simply throw our hands up in the air in frustration.
What is behind such a pessimistic stance? It may be that the person in question has been wounded so deeply, or so often, or both, that they have been driven into this apparent shell of protection which, if observed objectively, can clearly be recognised as the cause of even further suffering.
In the framework of Positive Intelligence (PQ), a framework for training Mental Fitness, this is described as a clear case of the so-called Hyper-Vigilant Saboteur having the upper hand in our incessant mental chatter.
The Saboteurs developed initially as a form of protection, a survival mechanism, so to say. They protect us as young children from experiences or perceptions that might well have overwhelmed us. They are the voices in our heads that generate negative emotions in the way we handle life’s everyday challenges. They cause all our stress, anxiety, self-doubt, frustration, restlessness, and unhappiness.
The Judge, for example, often arises in childhood when we are forced to decide if our parents do, indeed, fall short of infallibility; – that they are indeed the mixed bag of the human condition, and therefore imperfect, – or if it is perhaps our fault that we, utterly dependent young children that we are, are not getting our basic needs met.
The latter is usually the more palatable option (who wants to be at the mercy of parents who are not up to the job of rearing and protecting us?) so we begin to judge ourselves for not being worthy of the love we deserve and the attention we so yearn. In order not to be alone in this fate, we begin to judge our peers, siblings, etc. until the Judge becomes so firmly established in out inner dialogue, that we almost always fail to recognise its presence and its immense influence on our belief patterns and behaviour.
The Hyper-Vigilant also has its history. When, in the stone age, early humans heard the rustle of leaves in the jungle, it would have been smart to expect the worst and to react swiftly. It could have been a matter of life and death. In fact, it often was, and the DNA of only those who were appropriately vigilant was carried on to the next generations. The remainder became lunch for the tigers and snakes!
In the meantime, the nature of the jungle has changed, however, and very few incidents are a matter of life and death in our everyday lives. The neural response patterns of the Hyper-Vigilant remain, however, and, if let go unchecked, can seriously hamper us in our endeavours to live life to the full. The lie of the Hyper-Vigilant is that safety and belonging can be secured by always being in a heightened state of anticipation of the dangers coming around the next corner.
The first step to conquering the Saboteurs is identifying them, exposing their lies, and intercepting them before they hijack our thinking and subsequent actions. It’s a bit like turning the volume dial down from 10 to 2 or 1. This is only one element of PQ, however, the others being the activation of the Sage Powers of Empathy, Explore, Navigate, Innovate, and Activate, all in the perspective that says that every situation bears a gift.
The third element to be trained is Mind Command which enables us to quickly shift from Saboteur to Sage, ideally in real time, in any given situation.
If we stand back and shine some light on the Hyper-Vigilant Saboteur and its limiting beliefs, this is what we find.
The Hyper-Vigilant Saboteur causes continuous intense anxiety about all the dangers in life and what could go wrong. Those impacted by this Saboteur are generally sceptical and can even become cynical. Their constant anxiety burns vital energy. They may also lose credibility due to the `crying wolf´ phenomenon. They expect things to go wrong, and that often turns out to be the case. This is the inevitable consequence of The Law of Attraction or the Self-Fulfilling Prophesy.
Here’s how the Hyper-Vigilant Saboteur tries to sabotage our performance, well-being, and relationships by telling us that life is full of dangers, and we must constantly be on the look out for them. It causes us to distrust people and constantly question their motives. This Saboteur generates intense anxiety, which can be felt by others and may cause them to avoid us. It causes us to seek reassurance and guidance in procedures, rules, authorities, and institutions which appear to guarantee safety.
Finally, being in a heightened state of Hyper-Vigilance may cause others to avoid us as the intensity of our energy becomes draining, producing the exact opposite effect of the security and sense of belonging promised in its self-justifying lie.
At the cultural, societal level, the energy of this Saboteur is broadcast to every home and device 24/7 by the global media corporations. As within, so without. The ensuing Saboteur contagion, spread further in bus queues, at the water cooler, and in the local pubs or tea houses every day, everywhere, reinforces and keeps us stuck in this mode.
Some people would argue that we need this heightened sense of vigilance if we are to survive the jungle of the 21st century.
We know that our ability to feel pain is essential. If you touch a hot stove, it’s good to feel pain so you’re alerted to the danger to your body and rapidly remove your hand before lasting damage is caused. Similarly negative emotions like stress, fear, anger, disappointment, guilt, and shame are extremely helpful to alert you that something needs your attention. These are signposts pointing inward, despite our initial conviction that the solutions are to be found `out there´.
Once you have benefited from the alert, however, it is harmful to stay in those negative emotions. Staying in them makes it more difficult for you to think clearly or take the most effective action to deal with whatever problem we face. Your Sage mind is much more capable of being creative and insightful and in taking calm, clear-headed, decisive action to deal with whatever challenge led to those negative emotions.
If you find yourself staying in those negative emotions for more than a second, you can be sure that your Saboteurs are keeping your hand on the hot stove while loudly complaining about life being so difficult. Keeping that image in mind, we can pay close attention to how we feel throughout the day when we notice that we have strayed into negative emotions for more than a few seconds. For many people, confronting rather than fleeing the negative emotions may mean breaking new ground. It might feel like leaving our old comfort zone.
I just picture my saboteurs pressing my hand the hot stove. For a start, it’s enough to just focus on noticing those negative moments and picturing the saboteur pressing my hand on the hot stove. The key to this exercise is to do it blamelessly.
That means that when we witness ourselves and label that moment as a hand on the hot stove moment, we don’t want to get upset at ourselves for not doing better because, the moment we do get upset, our tricky Judge has come in through the back door and pressed our hand even harder on the hot stove. As we simply learn to observe the dynamic using this imagery, the saboteur habits begin to weaken automatically.
As we gradually wind down the volume of the Hyper-Vigilant Saboteur over weeks and months of daily PQ practice, we begin to relax. Our attention, no longer bound up in tight coils of mental tension, is now freed up to notice the beautiful and wondrous nature of life and all of creation. Paradoxically, we begin to experience more safety and belonging. We are one step closer to living the life we love.
