Taking Things Personally

`You have been telling the people that this is the Eleventh Hour, now you must go back and tell the people that this is the Hour.  And there are things to be considered . . .

Where are you living?
What are you doing?
What are your relationships?
Are you in right relation?
Where is your water?
Know your garden.
It is time to speak your Truth.
Create your community.
Be good to each other.
And do not look outside yourself for the leader.´

Then he clasped his hands together, smiled, and said, `This could be a good tim
`There is a river flowing now very fast. It is so great and swift that there are those who will be afraid. They will try to hold on to the shore. They will feel they are torn apart and will suffer greatly.
`Know the river has its destination. The elders say we must let go of the shore, push off into the middle of the river, keep our eyes open, and our heads above water. And I say, see who is in there with you and celebrate. At this time in history, we are to take nothing personally, least of all ourselves. For the moment that we do, our spiritual growth and journey comes to a halt.
`The time for the lone wolf is over. Gather yourselves! Banish the word struggle from you attitude and your vocabulary. All that we do now must be done in a sacred manner and in celebration.
`We are the ones we’ve been waiting for.´
An unnamed Elder of the Hopi Nation, Oraibi, Arizona, North America

As my sixtieth birthday approaches, I find myself in a vibrant mood; a combination of celebration of the life of the years passed and enthusiasm for what lies ahead. It is a good time to review what has gone well, where the difficulties have been, and how the lessons learned can be applied as the coming decades unfold. In this respect, the above quote recently fell into my lap like a shining bright jewel.

I first became aware of the Hopi Nation in 1982 when the film Koyaanisqatsi, directed by Godfrey Reggio with music by Philip Glass, hit the big screen. Created between 1975 and 1982, the film is an apocalyptic vision of the collision of two different worlds – urban life and technology versus the environment. There are several meanings to the word `ko.yaa.nis.katsi´ (from the Hopi language). These include; 1. crazy life, 2. life in turmoil, 3. life disintegrating, 4. life out of balance and, 5. a state of life that calls for another way of living.

This film turned out to be formative and enriching in more ways than one. In addition to being introduced to the Hopi culture and the magnificent desert landscapes of North America, it was also the beginning of a joyful and enduring relationship with the beautiful music of Philip Glass.

Mother Nature, community, music, landscape, sustainability, the spiritual path (in this case, the Red Road); these are key elements of my life, thanks, in some part, to my attention being drawn to their importance by masterpieces such as this film.

As a linguist, I also was fascinated by the array of differently nuanced meanings which the word of the title holds. The implication of these various meanings is that chaos and disintegration call for repentance, – turning around to establish a new way of life – and contain the seeds of the new harmonious order.

My own life has been punctuated by such turning points. As a young student, asphyxiated by the religious, political and economical constraints of my native Ireland, I broke loose and emigrated to a country where I had never been and knew not a single soul. In the resilience and elation of youth, I took well to my new surroundings and, despite heart-wrenching home sickness and an unhealthy fondness for the drink, was able to stake my claim to a life of learning, creativity, fun, and independence. I was going to show the world that I could be successful!

In my early forties, a mid-life crisis struck, in the throes of which it became clear to me that I had to get sober or die. Wanting to live, I quit. This coincided with the almost unendurable pain of ruptures in the realms of family, friends and career. The life built upon the sand of my own person – I had unwittingly come to believe that VIP stood for `Very Important Patrick´ – had been dashed to pieces by a tsunami in the long hot summer of 2003, leaving me standing in the rubble of my dreams. As Edith Eger writes in her beautiful memoir `The Choice´; `as long as we are trying to prove anything, we can never be free.´

More challenging changes lay ahead; those encountered in the process of building a new life, trusting that it could be good despite the destruction of the illusion of control, that the Universe would guide and support me as I discovered, each day anew, how to do the `next right thing´.  I often felt like a trapeze artist in the middle of my act in the big top, having let go of one swing, summersaulting in mid air and not being able to locate the next swing to catch hold of. This is a scary situation, especially as there was no safety net.

Those who grow up in a healthy manner have a safety net of resources; they have learned to believe in themselves. Addicts, on the other hand, having not grown up first time around, and, lucky to get a second chance once they have crashed and burned, must begin the next phase without a safety net. This is called `living in recovery´. The good news is that we get to discover, accumulate, and use tools and resources which help us eventually learn to live life on life’s terms.

These years in recovery have not been a bed of roses, yet they have been good beyond my wildest dreams. I wake up each day with a genuine feeling of gratitude for having been granted one more new day. Rifts have been mended, amends made. Personal and professional challenges that have deepened and widened my vitality have come my way. A brush with death, brought on by a mysterious bout of sepsis a few years ago, beckoned me to embrace my mortality; since doing just that, I have been more alive than ever before. None of this would have been possible had it not been for `the call for another way of living´.

And now? As I enter the final two fifths or quarter of this incarnation, I see there is still more flotsam and jetsam to be thrown overboard. Especially in the realm of relationships, I am challenged. Am I in right relation? How do I create my community? Can I live up to my aspiration to live by the maxim: `Be good to each other´? How do I discover and re-discover the leader within my Self?

They say that it is this realm of relationships that heals last, due to the fact that it is what first got broken. Be that as it may, not taking things personally is indispensable in the process of healing and growth.

`We are so privileged to still have time´ – John O’Donohue

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